I am addicted to porn.
They say that the hardest part of beating an addiction is admitting you have one, but for me I have always known deep-down that my porn usage is out of control, excessive and destructive, and so this for me has been the easy bit.
The hard bit is actually quitting. Unlike any other drug I can think of, porn is present and available nearly all the time. I don’t have to go out and meet some dodgy dealer on a street somewhere; it is there and ready on the same laptop or device I was using to browse Facebook. This means the temptation is constantly present and the willpower required to abstain is infinitely greater.
My goal is to gain total control over my porn usage. For the foreseeable future, that means complete abstinence from porn until I have mended the mental damage caused. Maybe forever. Whatever it takes.
The approach I am taking to beat this is one of education and honesty. I have told my girlfriend of over 7 years and she has been incredibly supportive. I have set up this blog and a Twitter account to allow me to express myself without the fear of judgement or impact to my daily life.
Through this blog and twitter I will discuss things like what my usage has been like, how I view “addiction”, how I think I got into it, why it has been so hard to quit and the effect it has had on my life.
I suspect there must be many others out there who are in a similar situation and perhaps this blog can show them they are not alone and share some tips or ideas about how to beat this thing.
That’s all for now. I have so much I want to write but all in good time!